Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Nine Years Later

Hubs is definitely nicer than I am. Here’s why…

Next Thursday will be our 9th anniversary. Nine Years!!! It feels longer, both in good and bad ways. He still snores like a rocket about to launch, you know. But through it all, so much have happened since my last anniversary post here.

Over these years, I’ve learned a few things about marriage (and of course, am still learning). Be the front and center to your children. Say thank you. You’re allowed to get mad. Kiss each other goodbye.

But Hubs, who is actually a year younger but a lot wiser, does something really great. Coming out of nowhere, he texts, tells other people, says in my face in front of children, that he is lucky to have found me. Cheez. He does that even seconds after a verbal fight.

I usually shrug it off, thinking “hmm..bola!”. But deeper, I know he means it. And he wants me to hear it.
Not exactly, but in similar matter, I read an article about a husband who also does something great. In height of an argument, he says, "I love you!" right in the middle. It's amazing.

Here's what the husband said: "The secret to a long and happy marriage is not the idea that nothing bad is ever going to happen. But it's that when something bad happens, you know how to get through it together. One of the most important things is that when you're having a fight, instead of ratcheting up the emotion, you diffuse it. In the middle of a fight, say, "I love you; you're the most important person in the world to me," even if at that moment, those words are the hardest ones to choke out because you're so mad. It reminds you both of the big picture. It doesn't make it instantly better, but it takes it down a notch. And in the cool-down period afterward, you're not left questioning. You know everything is going to be ok. Half an hour after the fight, it's over and you feel good."

Great idea, right? I cannot tell you what a difference it makes. I'm still too hotheaded to do it myself, but I'm glad Hubs is nicer, better, sweeter person than I am.

What little secrets and tips do you have for relationships? Do you fight fair? I'd love to hear...

{Photo via LeLove}


  1. Wow, kudos to your husband...and yes what you've stated and your husbands were all true....advance happy 9 years anniv and more to go hanggang sa pagtanda nyo hehehe....your husband I presume is one of the sweetest I guess.

  2. wow naman. ang sweet ng hubby.may you have a wonderful blessed marriage life

  3. Hi Phioxee and Jay! Well, masarap pabola paminsan minsan. Sa relationship kasi parang ang daming reasons to feel unstable. But there are also perks that keep it going. Thanks for dropping by!

  4. naks! nakakatuwa naman... first time ko sa blog mo... ^_^

    Natutuwa talaga ako pag nakakakita ng Happy marriage Life...

    Godbless po!

  5. Aww, your husband is really sweet! You're very lucky and it seems he is too, and very proud of it! Congratulations to your nine years... and counting! :)

    It's just sad that at times, people always have the eager to be right (pride!), up to a point where their relationship would already suffer and eventually end.

  6. We are lucky to have found a hubby who is sweet (in their own way) and patient with our antics. There are a lot to learn in a marriage and we have a lifetime of discovering them with the best partners in the world.
    happy 9th anniversary... ang bilis ano?

  7. Malunggay! Has it really been 9 years? I agree with Dio, ang bilis talaga ng panahon. Congratulations on staying committed and together thus far, and here's to many more years til death do you part ikanga. Or even beyond pa. God bless you and your family always!

  8. @Jon and Caroline, nice you guys to drop by! And thank you for finding us as sweet people! Sadly, this is just a snapshot in time of our married life. There are still days where we annoyed each other.

    @ Lola D & Lola M, time flies ika nga. If there's one thing about marriage that I learned in all these years is, all the weddings are happy. It's trying to live together afterwards that causes all the miseries haha!